Cereal Killer

In order to continue to improve our products and deliver more sophisticated features and performance, we are harnessing some of the latest improvements in web browser technology. This includes faster JavaScript processing and new standards like HTML5. As a result, over the course of 2010, we will be phasing out support for Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0 as well as other older browsers that are not supported by their own manufacturers.

We plan to begin phasing out support of these older browsers on the Google Docs suite and the Google Sites editor on March 1, 2010. After that point, certain functionality within these applications may have higher latency and may not work correctly in these older browsers. Later in 2010, we will start to phase out support for these browsers for Google Mail and Google Calendar.

Google Apps will continue to support Internet Explorer 7.0 and above, Firefox 3.0 and above, Google Chrome 4.0 and above, and Safari 3.0 and above.

Starting this week, users on these older browsers will see a message in Google Docs and the Google Sites editor explaining this change and asking them to upgrade their browser. We will also alert you again closer to March 1 to remind you of this change.

In 2009, the Google Apps team delivered more than 100 improvements to enhance your product experience. We are aiming to beat that in 2010 and continue to deliver the best and most innovative collaboration products for businesses.

Thank you for your continued support!

Sincerely,

The Google Apps team

Seriously, if you cannot move your car forward without rolling backwards you should not be driving. Nonetheless help is at hand!

Here is a guide courtesy of five spare minutes for those who’s memory has lapsed since they did their test.

This, is a handbrake. It is used to stop a car. If you utilise it then your car WON’T ROLL BACKWARDS INTO WHOEVER IS UNFORTUNATE ENOUGH TO BE NEAR YOU.

Steps:
1) Pull handbrake to apply.
2) Move forward and disengage handbrake.

http://open.spotify.com/track/5apLxy6Ko3gkOw8YtavIoe

Following on from the new rules for the parking of cars and the charges councils can now apply in fines, a new nationwide initiative was announced today to help leverage even more stealth tax from the hard-pressed motorist to help ensure Labour are completely un-electable at the next election..

The following “fines” may be levied at any time, either direct ticketing by parking gorillas or by the new network of cameras being installed by Nannystate Video’s Limited. In following true tradition, all fine application and collection services will be outsourced to enable companies such as Capita, National Car Parks and EDS to make even more money out of the the government.

The new extra regulations are as follows:

* £60 fine:
o Driving a bright red Skoda
o Driving a 4×4 if you are female and blond
o Listening to rap music with your window open
o Affixing “vote for” signs to the car window during elections
o Eating with your mouth open
o Driving in a Welsh accent
o Stopping at any time on the M25, irrespective of traffic queues
o Eating your own food at one of the rip-off motorway stopovers
o Any premiership football regalia on the back window

* £300 fine
o Driving a green Skoda
o Possession of a Churchill Insurance, nodding, orgasmic “Oh Yes!” dog
o Driving with one arm resting on an open window
o Wearing offensive sun glasses
o Possession of a comedy warning yellow diamond sticker on the back window
o A car with two passengers of combined weight more than 240 kilos entering a drive-thru McDonalds
o Towing a caravan on a B road during daylight
o Any 1st Division football regalia on the back window

* £600 fine
o Driving a bright yellow Skoda
o Using shopping trolley key-fob coins in parking meters
o Having a criminal record, especially anything by Sugarbabes or Leona Lewis
o Saluting traffic wardens in a “Heil Hitler” fashion
o Possessing a pair of furry, dangly dice
o Wearing a baseball cap back to front
o Driving with one leg resting on the window
o Travelling with the mother-in-law in the back seat without a mouth gag
o Using Gatzo cameras for target practice
o Using parking attendants for target practice
o Any Scottish Premier division football regalia on the back window

There was a uncomfortable silence this morning when the news was broken by the Queen at breakfast that ‘Phillip’ had bet Wales on a pair of two’s on a recent trip to Las Vegas.

Its new owner “Golden Palace” casino’s gave a statement that it would not be taking Wales away from the UK immediately as its inhabitants will need time to adapt to it not raining. They have announced plans to sponsor participants from the Red Bull air race in a lucrative sponsorship deal to tow it away. Speed Cameras are being re-pointed to the sky in light of the welsh constabularly having the chance of making a quick few quid.

A spokesman from Sipgwgsgseuiobergbse, Wales was optimistic however could not comment as he was in the queue to swap his wellies for a sombrero.

A representative from the Royal family justified the expenditure with the statement that the Prince had been trying to help the country with the betting spree in that if the hand had gone his way he would have been $50 dollars up, (About 15 pence) and was trying to save Northern Rock.

Conservative Party leader David Cameron is in the spotlight again today after it was announced that he had recently failed his Cycling Proficiency Test for the sixth time, breaking a 112-year national record.

Cameron, who was arrested by the Metropolitan police earlier this week for several different miscarriages of the Highway Code, failed this time on ‘not knowing his left from his right’, (something he has been accused of in his political outlook) and for ‘blandness in the saddle’. He is due to take the test again next month.

The Tory leader was photographed last week by a Daily Mirror journalist, and could be seen committing various heinous flauntings of the Highway Code, including:

1. Driving the wrong way up a One Way street.
2. Pulling a wheelie in a crowded shopping area.
3. Standing on the crossbar whilst traversing London Bridge.
4. Having no lights on his bike.
5. Having no brakes on his bike.
6. Having no bell on his bike.
7. Riding his bike at speeds in excess of 60mph.
8. Overloading his panniers.

Mr Cameron has already apologised for his indiscretions, and told journalists that:

“I know I have made a mistake on this occasion”,

failing to remember that he had been photographed on 3 SEPARATE OCCASIONS, not just once.

Detective Chief Superintendent Frank Saddlebag told the Spoof:

“This shows he isn’t taking his cycling obligations seriously. I suspect that if, and when, he becomes Prime Minister, similar hollow promises will be made about the running of the country.”

Land Rover Discovery Tire Fitment Guide
(Reproduced from http://members.shaw.ca/jbarge/tires.html)
Fitting is for “Series I” Discoveries only (1989 to 1998).
Sizes are as per B.F.Goodrich M/T, A/T Trac-Edge (where available) courtesy of BFGoodrich

* Actual modifications required may vary by tire make.
* Non BFG tires uses theoretical data as explained below.